


Promise

by Crowned_Ladybug



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, M/M, at least to some extent so you can keep writing it in your mind until it ends happy, just pure angst, their relationship is just very vaguely included tbh you can ignore it i'd say
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-06
Updated: 2017-10-06
Packaged: 2019-01-09 20:09:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12283527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crowned_Ladybug/pseuds/Crowned_Ladybug
Summary: He’s a hero, god damn it, he’s a hero and heroes don’t take days off. Heroes don’t sit around and wait until their wounds heal up. Heroes shouldn’t get hurt in the first place.Heroes get their asses out there and do their damn job of protecting people.





	Promise

**Author's Note:**

> It's very rare that I write pure angst (and apparently when I do people on Tumblr really enjoy it for some reason) but when I do...
> 
> This is another fic that doesn't fit into my canon about the egos, or at least I never kept writing it to make it fit in

One uncertain step after the other – left, right, left, a little stumble, there, find your balance again, left, right, left – Jackie makes his way over to the door, stubborn as ever. God damn, his side hurts like a bitch but he resists the urge to wrap an arm around himself. He’s not exactly steady on his feet and he has to lift his hips sideways with every other step because his right knee won’t bend like he wants it to.

He would never admit how much pain he’s in.

He’s a hero, god damn it, he’s a _hero_ and heroes don’t take days off. Heroes don’t sit around and wait until their wounds heal up. Heroes shouldn’t get hurt in the first place.

Heroes get their asses out there and do their damn job of protecting people.

Just a few more steps and he’ll be out the door, and then a few hundred painstaking others until he makes his way back to the city. Shouldn’t be a problem, right? Not to a hero. Not to Jackieboy man.

He never makes it to the door.

Marvin stands in his way, with so much determination and firmness in his movement that Jackie suddenly feels like he’s the shorter one. Marvin’s shoulders are squared, his jaw clenched and Jackie swears he can see the storm raging on inside of him.

“Really, Jackie?”

Jackie huffs a laugh. “Really what?” It takes all of his self-control not to reach for his side. Damn, who would have thought that a small laugh could hurt that much.

Marvin doesn’t respond. His shoulders shake and he averts his eyes for a moment, furrowing his brow. His stern shell cracks already, just like that. Jackie isn’t surprised – Marvin has never been able to keep his emotions under veil for long. He just has so many of them and feels with such intensity. Jackie loves that about him.

It’s impossible to miss the quake in Marvin’s voice when he speaks again. “What if one night you don’t come home?”

Jackie doesn’t get the chance to speak and for a moment he’s glad about that, then…

“What-...what would I do then?” Marvin’s voice cracks and he can feel tears coming already. He didn’t want it to end up like this, he really didn’t. He clenches his hands into fists to stop them from shaking. “What would I do if you didn’t come home again? God... _damn_ it, Jackie, I,” the tears come and once they start spilling from his eyes there’s no stopping them and there’s no stopping himself from breaking, either. Jackie watches as the tears drip down the white of Marvin’s mask, one by one until they turn into streams. “You’re a god damn hero all the other nights, for once...just this _one fucking time_ , please...fucking _please_ be selfish. Just this once put yourself before others and take care of yourself first and _stay_.”

Marvin could go on forever but his tongue stops cooperating and there’s a lump in his throat and he feels like he’s suffocating. His breath comes in short bursts that he refuses to let turn into sobs. No matter how hard he clenches his fists, his fingernails digging into his skin he can’t stop shaking, but he’ll be damned if he lets Jackie leave. Over his dead body, maybe.

Jackie stumbles forward (Marvin doesn’t miss the way his body tenses with pain) and Marvin bites the inside of his cheek. He doesn’t want this to end in a fight.

But before he knows it he’s pulled against Jackie in a hug, and his knees almost buckle because god damn, he needed this. He _needs_ this. He curls his fists into the back of Jackie’s suit (because _somehow_ he has his stupid superhero outfit on again) and holds him as tight as he can without hurting him.

It’s probably laughable, how Marvin is sobbing, burying his face into Jackie’s shoulder yet he pours all the power he still has into his voice to say “I’m not letting you leave.”

“It’s okay,” Jackie mumbles and Marvin wishes he was right. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Part of Marvin silently screams “liar!” but another, more desperate and scarred part of him really, really wants to believe him.

  


Jackie stays. For the night at least.

They spend the rest of the evening on the couch. It hurts Jackie to move a lot and Marvin simply doesn’t want to and so they don’t.

They cuddle up together and for a moment, even though he knows things aren’t alright, Marvin lets himself believe that he’s found heaven when Jackie lays his head on his chest and traces little patterns into his stomach. Quietly they talk about nothings that are still interesting to _them_ , about magic tricks and comic books and about “what do you wanna have for lunch tomorrow”. They laugh even, or well, Marvin does, his whole body shaking with it and Jackie smiles into his shirt then. Jackie doesn’t laugh, he smiles and chuckles and huffs because that’s the most he can do with his side hurting, but Marvin knows. Jackie says sweet things, a lot of them, all about Marvin as he traces circles into the back of his hand. He wants to make up for scaring him so much until he’s man enough to apologise properly.

They pretend they’re okay.

They go to sleep together in Jackie’s room because they both know that Marvin would have nightmares otherwise. He gets them way too often nowadays. Marvin falls asleep with his arm wrapped around Jackie’s waist and Jackie thinking that Marvin is the sweetest thing in the world.

In the morning when they wake up (Marvin first and then Jackie) everything seems brighter. Marvin calls Jackie “sunshine” half-jokingly and kisses his forehead, and Jackie pulls him back when he would get up so they can cuddle a bit more. They feel so happy, so cosy and at home, and Jackie doesn’t have the heart to tell Marvin how many times he had woken up during the night because the pain wouldn’t let him rest.

Marvin believes that they’re okay and Jackie lets him because he would do anything just to keep that light in his eyes.

  


But that night when Marvin walks into the living room, tray in hand with tea made for two, just how Jackie likes it, he finds the couch empty. That night when Marvin runs around the house frantically, searching every room, Jackie is nowhere to be seen. That night Jackie leaves again, barely on his feet and clenching his teeth every other step, to be the hero he’s always been. That night Marvin wants to run after him, find him, bring him home, he wants to scold him, ease his pain, hold him until he doesn’t have to be scared to let go anymore.

But he doesn’t. That night Marvin stands in the doorway, staring out into the night that took Jackie from him for the hundredth time and crying silent tears.

That night something inside of Marvin breaks.


End file.
